I could possibly be the worst blogger known to man. Last time I posted on here, I was in New York in a small town outside of Buffalo. A lot has changed since than and I am back in my original stomping grounds. I just celebrated my 23rd birthday and 2013 has been exceptionally beautiful even with the slight hiccups. It’s slightly crazy how so much can change in less than a year, and I feel as though I have grown so much. I have gotten back in the swing of things being back in L.A. Work has taken over my life again, but I love it, and I can’t imagine doing anything else. I also have really missed my blog and it is a priority for me to keep going with it. I have received a lot of comments since I stopped, asking me to come back. Whether my old readers come back, I thank you all for your support.
So, welcome back to my blog! I am excited to post about everything that has been going on with my life these days. Lets just say there is never a dull moment. For instance, I became friends with a possum on my front yard, well I wish I became friends with it. Unfortunately it was dying, but I let it pass away slowly in peace on my front door way entrance. I am also attempting at writing a book; we will see how that goes. Lastly, work has been a whirl wind, but I am excited for everything that’s coming up. I love vegan food, and recently started the juicing thing for my health. Ok I think I have babbled quite enough. So please look forward to more posts. I won’t be just focusing on fashion, I am going to be doing plenty more which I hope all of you enjoy
Last week I drew a heart on the calendar for this date. I really did not know why I did it, but 12 is a very balanced number in my life, kind of like ying and yang, black and white, up and down, you get the gist of it. I am happy I did, because today I finally realized that I love myself for once in a very long time. I don’t think I ever knew how to love myself without someone else telling me that they loved me. At this very moment in my life everything is perfect. I wish I knew how to explain it, but I think it just has to happen, you just have to experience it for yourself. I am not clouded by worry, or fear, or anger, I am just me and happy. The best part, this happiness and love wasn’t born from a relationship, or a physical possession, or anything really, ok well nature did help a little, but it was the right moment with the right peace of mind. I needed to share this with someone or anybody really, because when you are truly happy you want the world to know. So I am happy to admit that for once since I was probably a little girl, I am happy and I love myself, and accomplished it on my own, with the help of a very interesting life.
The Keeper (Banks Remix) By Bonobo
Everything Ft. Bajka by Radio Citizen
Erase & Rewind by The Cardigans
Eyesdown(Floating Points Remix) by Bonobo
How Soon is Now by The Smiths
The Use of Unacceptable Colours in Nature by Boom Bip
Bongo Bong by Manu Chao
I have been baby sitting my grandpa for the past week, which has been keeping me busy and away from my blog. I have never spent this much time alone with my grandpa, and it is really a weird experience. Anyone that knows me very well knows that I always looked up to my grandfather, and would always say I wanted a man like him when I decided to settle down. Boy was that illusion a slap in the face. My grandfather moved in a year ago because his wife left him for a woman, took almost everything he had, and tried putting him into a retirement home. Of course my mother took it upon herself to take care of him and help him through his rough time.
Little did I know, finding out the real man behind my grandfather, is not someone I aspire to find in any man. I have this theory that you should only really say you love someone till you have seen the pit and the peek of that person. I only knew the peek of my grandfather, and the pit was a rude awakening.Words cannot express how I felt after hearing my grandfather laugh at leaving his first fiancee alone at the altar in Japan, not feeling bad that he abandoned his four children for a women who took almost everything from him(his second wife), and having no shame for the fact that his last wife took everything that was promised to my two disabled aunts for the security of their future, and still have the audacity to demand my mother and I to find him a new girlfriend.
I won’t waste my time hating him, but I realized that finding the energy to love him, takes too much work also. An old friend of mine use to say to me that you should only give your love to someone who deserves it and wants it. I stopped saying those three words to him because they stopped meaning anything to me, and when he would say them back to me, I knew he didn’t feel them. It is a shame that my last memories and moments with my grandpa will never be good ones, but hiding in a false reality is not worth the pain. Life is way to short to love people that don’t help you grow.
P.S. sorry for the melancholy post, promise I will get back to my routine.
I finally got one role of film developed, and completely forgot what I took on it. Note to anyone who uses film, do not get it developed at Walmart, Walgreens is cheaper. I leave in about two weeks, and it seriously feels like I just got to Taos yesterday, which was a month ago. It is bitter sweet, but I do miss my pup, and well I really need to stop moping because I still have two weeks.
U Must Be- Gina Rene
So I realize that it has been forever since I have posted actual outfit photos, and I am terribly sorry for many reasons 1) I did not bring my computer or an sd card reader, so I am kind of out of luck in that department 2) I actually have not been taking a lot of pictures of my trip back to New Mexico, and the ones I have been taking are in film(reminder to go pick that up) 3) I have been a busy bee.
For the meantime let me scream in giddy excitement about how much I love the month of April(AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!) . I could be setting myself up for disaster because I always get really excited about this month, but so many great things are happening, such as my birthday! Not only is it my birthday but two of my best friends birthdays as well, one of them being today( Happy Birthday Sage!). Best of all, my Momma’s birthday is tomorrow( Love you Momma!).
Another beautiful thing about this month, CHERRY BLOSSOMS!! Or just budding trees and flowers altogether. All things beautiful happen this month, and yes I am definitely biased, but I am pretty sure all of you love seeing the budding flowers and the beautiful weather. So thank you for letting me rant about the best month ever, and I promise I will get back to my daily routine, of outfits, music, quotes, and much more <3 KIKI
I usually would not do this, but I mentioned earlier this year that I wanted to try new things for my blog, similar to a journal. So I am going to see how I feel about this random rant thing I am trying, and I have this sudden feeling to write, so bear with me while I try experimenting with my blog.
Last night I went out with a couple of friends to a movie, 21 Jump Street, which I recommend for everyone to go see. I literally laughed my head off. After the film we went out for some drinks, don’t worry I stuck with a soda. I was not in the mood for alcohol. I decided to leave early because well 1. I was exhausted and 2.my friends got me thinking, and when I start thinking, it is probably best to just let me go do my own thing. I was driving back to my friends house, when I almost did not turn to go to her place because I just stopped thinking, like my mind went blank. The fact that I could go a moment without thinking, is somewhat of a relief, and also a release. But what brought me to this peaceful state of mind? None other than driving.
I love driving….alone! Yah sure it sounds a bit strange, but for those 5 minutes of me just driving alone, was exactly what I needed. In college my freshman year, I would drive back home(a 2-3 hour drive) and I loved it. I felt like I had control over my life for those few hours. I swear my calling has to be a race car driver. Last night when I was driving back to my friends house, I probably would have kept going all the way to the west coast, and than turned right back around to ride onto the east coast, just because it keeps my mind from going off to another dimension. So what stopped me from doing this long trek to everywhere(and nowhere I suppose), my friend had my credit card, and it was her car.
I had a rough night sleeping last night, and a long drive would have done me good, but today made up for it. Took a nice hike which somewhat kept me occupied from other thinking. I do recommend to anyone, and everyone that if you like to drive and need a moment to just focus on the road and nothing more, than driving is a perfect release. Oh but please do it responsibly, because we already have enough crappy drivers out there. And thank you for letting me rant, for those of you who do actually read this.
This lovely thing was sitting at my door step yesterday, and I nearly screamed with joy because I have been so impatient to put it together. I definitely jumped the gun with all my excitement. Little did I know that I was about to jump into a project that I felt like tearing my hair out; good thing I didn’t. So to give everyone a heads up before purchasing this little plastic camera, just be prepared to spend at least 3-5 hours trying to figure out what goes where, even with the directions. I completed it in 3 hours last night, but realized I screwed up at the most important spot(the shutter), which took me another 2 hours to try and fix.
It is times like these when I am trying to build something that I need a boyfriend, but once I figured it out, I felt kind of proud of myself for trying to fix the problem instead of being like “screw this plastic thing”. After building this mini twin lens plastic camera, I defienitely have a new found respect for photography. I have always loved and admired photography and the people behind the amazing pictures, but after doing this little project, I definitely want to put more effort into what I take. There are way too many people out there that think they take great pictures because they own a camera; think again. Everyone should try putting this thing together before calling themselves a photographer, it gives you an idea of what is really behind or inside the functions of a camera.
This month is KikiCulture’s one year anniversary!!! To tell you the truth I did not think I would make it to one year, but I am really proud of myself for sticking with it. This blog is almost like my child, and going back to the very beginning, I have done a lot and changed a lot with the site. It is nice to go back and see what I was thinking and wearing a year ago. I want to thank everyone for supporting my blog, I have had so many comments and followers these past couple of months, it is some times overwhelming, but I am more than grateful. I am planning on doing some different things for my blog, make it more like a magazine or a journal. So get excited because I am thrilled to dive into the new things I have planned for all of my amazing readers
Since it is Superbowl Sunday I thought it was only appropriate to find your inner tomboy. I have always been a semi-tomboy at heart. I definitely do not have a problem going camping, hiking, or playing sports and getting a little dirty, that is the basis of its appeal. So today you should go out play some sports, maybe go on a hike, and come back home to watch some Football and drinks some beers or eat a ton of pizza and chicken wings, just go out and do something different or boyish I suppose ahaha. I have to work later today, but I am definitely going to try to do something active before I have to head off.
Passion- Nightmares on Wax